The best revenge is premature balding
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
