real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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