Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
