It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'm too high and old for this...
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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