everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
