Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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