whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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