Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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