I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
