I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
