I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
