Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
