So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize