i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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