I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize