gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Randomize