I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
