Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize