What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he was CRYING into my vagina
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
