i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
So. Much. Porn.
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