Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize