its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
