someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I cut my penus on the lid.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Just high enough for therapy.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
