I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
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