i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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