I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize