I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I smell like Dick and happiness
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
