i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Randomize
