yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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