The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize