Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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