How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
