yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Randomize
