Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Randomize
