bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
