I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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