I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
3 2 1 whiskey
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
