We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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