Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
