have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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