I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Alive.
So much puke
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
