i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
