all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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