we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize