Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
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