Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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