When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
