Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
