brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Me. At least after what I've been through.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
