Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
