i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
