So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize